I often remember the first time I called my parents and told them I was sorry over and over, and that I didn’t realize what I put them through as parents. My daughter was never as let’s just say mischievous as me, which lead to my many apologies to the wonderful couple who raised me.
Those apologies were accompanied by mentioning how I agreed with what my parents taught me and how they made me a better person in the long run for it.
It took me years to tell them how I appreciated their parenting. I was in my late thirties when I did that, so go figure the surprise and “WOW” I felt when I heard what I’m about to tell you.
My daughter and I often have conversations where we agree to disagree. My views are from a forty plus year old and hers are from a early twenty something with some college under her belt. And I understand that way of thinking; I’ve been there done that.
One of the biggest gears I grind is the way Disney and Nickelodeon has these young boy and girl actors grow up before our children and play young, giddy roles. Once they leave the shows, you see them with a record deal or movie and they have “grown up.” Then everything is sexually charged. I understand as you grow up boys and girls become young men and women. But, the children who watched them on the television shows didn’t see that maturation process so it seems overnight they became “dirty”.
As usual, one day I was going off about my disdain about post Disney/Nickelodeon actors and my daughter chimed in disagreeing with me. That of course wasn’t the surprise, and we were going back and forth and she mentioned how she understood the maturation process when she heard Brittney Spears…“Baby One More Time” album. She explained she was able to recognize that even though she recently saw her as a Disney kid, seeing her as an “adult” didn’t happen overnight.
That wasn’t even the good part!
She then went on to say it was because Theresa and I taught her right…
Yes you saw the writing correctly. Our daughter said we taught her right.
So after my having to stop the conversation to have her repeat what she said to Theresa and just enjoy that moment in time and soak in all in, I asked her to explain. She basically told us that she knew the realities of life up to that point and realized there was a process to maturation and she just enjoyed the music for what it was…music.
Often times as parents we wonder if we are doing the right thing, if we should have been harder or more lenient. Should we have given our children more or less freedom? These questions pop up often. I know my parents weren’t, nor are we perfect parents. But, it’s always good to hear your child say you did at least one thing right. It is truly a blessing.
As a parent has your child told you something similar? Have you as a parent apologized or thanked your parents for the way you were raised? I would love to hear your stories.